How do you know who to trust?

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Who to trust?

You always hear stories about people who get screwed over by their friends that they trusted. How do you prevent such from happening to you? Here are a few principles.

If someone behaves shadily to someone else, they will eventually do that to you too

The key to knowing who to trust is not how close they are to you, but what their core values are. When there are no zero-sum game going on between you, it’s easy to be friends. However, for some people, once they can get some advantage by screwing you over, that becomes an obvious choice.

If you have a friend who often talks about how he tricked someone else, even though he told you because you are buddies, you have to be careful of his later on. On the other hand, if your friend is always talking about how to help others, then even if you are not as close of a friend, you can trust them more.

This is like judging if you want to date/work with someone based on how they treat waiters and waitresses. If they treat you will, it just means they want something from you, but you can evaluate they true personality by how they treat others.

Careful of those who just talk about making money

If you are working with someone who just talks about money all the time, you should be careful. In their minds, making money is one of their high priorities in life, and even though working with them as partners might get you to gain a lot, it also means that there are chances that they will screw you over for a big enough paycheck. If a person always talks about “creating an impact” or “changing the industry” then you have a better feel of what motivates them and you can trust them a little better.

There is nothing wrong with wanting money or working with people that just want money. However, it’s a good red flag to raise before you completely get screwed over by someone who has been treating you well for three years.

Build your reputation with trust

In the same way, you want to build up your reputation with the right values too. If you are always talking about making money and showing off how you ripped off some stupid person, not only do you sound sleezier, but overdoing that will cause people to trust you less. Idealy you don’t want to ever be shady and do thing with integrity, but either way, you don’t want to promote that part of your personality to people.

Rather sound altruistic and naive than too materilistic and calculatey. A lot of people would want to work with you if they think you are easily tricked, instead of thinking that you are out there to trick people.

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